About two months ago, my mom was re-diagnosed with cancer. Incurable. These last two months have been hard, watching her get weaker and weaker. She's in pain, but the doctor's can't seem to do anything about it. Two months ago, when the doctor told her, he made it sound like her treatment would give her a better quality of life until, well, it happens. My family planned out a big summer, not knowing if it would be her last or not. We figured we'd have at least a year before things started turning sour. We were wrong. Each day, it's just a constant struggle for her. She has no appetite, so she's not eating much. As a result, she's losing weight. She sits around so she's not exercising too much. She doesn't want to burn too many calories so she can gain some weight back. As a result, she's getting weaker because she's not exercising. Even if she wanted to, though, she couldn't, because of the constant pain. I feel like there is no plus side to the situation. I know it sounds terrible, but I feel like all we do is sit around, waiting. I hate that. I'm the person who fixes things. I hate conflict. I hate it when things aren't right.
But I can't fix my mom. Still, I wish there was something, anything, I could do to make her feel better. To make her have more good days than bad days.
One thing that has really been driven home for me over the last couple of months... always cherish the people God has given to you. It's the people in your life that matter the most. Not the new car or the new house. The people. I know right now I can't imagine life without my mom. She has always been that image of support for me. She has always been there to help me or give me advice when I need it. I cherish those moments now. I cherish the memories and all the good times. And I will cherish every single day that I have left with her.
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